Jimmy Kimmel seized the chance on Wednesday night to ridicule Elon Musk’s apparent quest to repopulate Silicon Valley with dozens of “mini-Musks.”
The late-night host highlighted an investigative report that detailed the DOGE boss’s plan to father as many children as possible.
”The Wall Street Journal, of all places, published a bonkers account of Musk’s efforts to seed the world in his own image,“ Kimmel explained in his monologue. He referred to Musk’s dream as a “harem of baby mamas.”
“The story said he’s been using his social media platform to recruit women to carry his children, and then he buys their silence with multi-million dollar non-disclosure agreements,” said Kimmel.
“Who said romance is dead?” he asked.
“It is believed that Elon has fathered at least 14 children,” Kimmel continued. Musk has drawn criticism for fathering these kids by at least four different women, and allegedly for being absent in several of his kids’ lives.
Showing a viral image of Musk shirtless at a beach, Kimmel added, “Based on this photograph, he may have given birth to them, too. He’s probably carrying a few around in his pouch like a kangaroo.”
“Sources told the Journal they believe there could be more mini-Musks out there,” Kimmel said. “Many more mini-Musks. You’ve heard of Alien vs. Predator? Elon might be both of them.”
Kimmel tried to understand Musk’s reasoning for intentionally fathering so many kids.
“He has stated in the past that he believes declining birth rates are the greatest threat to humanity,” Kimmel said. “I’m not sure what planet Elon lives on. This one seems full to me.”
Kimmel asked Musk, “Ever try to get out of the parking lot at Dodger Stadium? I think we’re good on people.”
Musk noted a detail from the WSJ article that claimed Musk had once texted a woman who was pregnant with his child, “To reach legion-level before the apocalypse, we will need to use surrogates.”
“He even texts like a supervillain,” Kimmel joked. “He’s Sex Luther.”
Kimmel concluded, “It is kind of sweet, I guess. Elon loves babies. I mean, he spent $300 million to get one elected president.”
